Is Ignoring A Form Of Violence?

I am reaching out to the Internet hive-mind in search of suggestions and comments regarding a question I’ve been asking myself.

If you read my previous post, you’ll know that I recently finished reading the book by Walter Wink called Jesus and Nonviolence: A Third Way. Since reading this book, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about violence, nonviolence, and what Wink calls Jesus’s “Third Way” of creative nonviolent resistance to oppressive violence. As fate would have it, I’m faced with a problem that could apply but I am struggling with defining the situation as oppressively violent. And so I turn to you.

The setup of this problem is simple. I have a need that requires the assistance of someone else since this other person controls key aspects and mechanism that my need relies upon. After multiple requests for help, I have had no response at all. I have not even received a simple acknowledgment that the request was received. I can only assume at this point that the other person has some “issue” (lack of time, disagreement with, etc.) with my request. This has come to the point that I’m angry, and the reactions I’ve pondered range between avoidance and engagement. I’ve thought about finding a solution that does not involve this person in any way and thus remove them as an obstacle. But I’ve also thought about attempting to shame this person by going over their head to their boss, or calling this person out in front of their peers. As I reflected on these options I realized that that perhaps I’m reacting in ways that Wink suggests are normal reactions to violence (fight or flight), but that also differ from “the third way” of nonviolent resistance.

So my question for you is this, is ignoring someone, or something in general, a form of violence? And if it is, then what options does the oppressed have to respond that are consistent with “the third way” (neither fight or flight)?

Of course, to be fair, as I’ve considered all this I have been forced to think about all the issues I have been ignoring (both big and small) as well. It is hard to think of myself as acting violently in these situations, but now that I’m on the other side I have to at least wonder.

I’d love to hear what you all think!